**THE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER**

"It’s a mark of the highest honor when I say it’s even more riveting than an episode of 'Dateline'。"
―The New York Times

From Paul Holes， the detective who found the Golden State Killer， Unmasked is a memoir that "grabs its reader in a stranglehold and proves more fascinating than fiction and darker than any noir narrative。" （ LA Magazine ）

I order another bourbon， neat。 This is the drink that will flip the switch。 I don’t even know how I got here， to this place， to this point 。 Something is happening to me lately。 I’m drinking too much。 My sheets are soaking wet when I wake up from nightmares of decaying corpses。 I order another drink and swig it， trying to forget about the latest case I can’t shake。

Crime solving for me is more complex than the challenge of the hunt， or the process of piecing together a scientific puzzle。 The thought of good people suffering drives me， for better or worse， to the point of obsession。 People always ask how I am able to detach from the horrors of my work。 Part of it is an innate capacity to compartmentalize; the rest is experience and exposure， and I’ve had plenty of both。 But I have always taken pride in the fact that I can keep my feelings locked up to get the job done。 It’s only been recently that it feels like all that suppressed darkness is beginning to seep out。

When I look back at my long career， there is a lot I am proud of。 I have caught some of the most notorious killers of the twenty-first century and brought justice and closure for their victims and families。 I want to tell you about a lifetime solving these cold cases， from Laci Peterson to Jaycee Dugard to the Pittsburg homicides to， yes， my twenty-year-long hunt for the Golden State Killer。

But a deeper question eats at me as I ask myself， at what cost？ I have sacrificed relationships， joy―even fatherhood―because the pursuit of evil always came first。 Did I make the right choice？ It’s something I grapple with every day。 Yet as I stand in the spot where a young girl took her last breath， as I look into the eyes of her family， I know that， for me， there has never been a choice。 “I don’t know if I can solve your case，” I whisper。 “But I promise I will do my best。”

It is a promise I know I can keep。